Classic games, especially those that were released during the classic arcade gaming era (think early 90’s) had a wealth of knowledge to impart on us. You may have missed some of these critical lessons because you were so caught up in just how much fun these games really were. One of the most popular games of early 90s arcade games was a 2-player, coin-op (coin-operated) gem called Final Fight.
Final Fight is the story of one Mike Haggar, a former street fighter who has recently been elected mayor of Metro City. When his only daughter, Jessica, gets kidnapped, Mike Haggar does what any good Dad would do: he dons his one-suspendered streetfighin’ clothes and goes on a bare-chested, crime-fighting rampage through the city.
Does Mike plan to do all of the crime fighting on his own? Of course not! Jessica’s boyfriend Cody and Cody’s friend, Guy, come along to join the crime-fightin’ fray.
Final Fight is full of wonderful street fighting lessons that you can employ right away. Here is the Final Fight Guide to Street Fighting
RULE #1: If You’re In a Fight Knock Sh*t Over!
One of the coolest things about Final Fight was how you had some limited interaction with the environment around you. You could knock over trash cans, break crates, and so much more. What’s the benefit of doing this? You just never know what you might find. When three four or more people gang up on you in a street fight, what better Godsend than a surgical-grade Japanese katana sitting in a trash can that you just got hurled into.
RULE #2: It’s Okay To Hit a Woman if You’re Daughter’s Life is At Stake?
I’m sure there had to have been a tremendous uproar seeing Mike Haggar grab a Mad Gear woman by the shoulders, jump up as high as all those muscles would allow him, and proceed to pile drive her face into the Metro City concrete.
I guess once Haggar’s crime fighting fire has been lit, nobody is safe…even handcuff/knife-wielding females. I think you messed with the wrong dude, Mad Gear.
RULE #3: If You Get in a Fight, Always Bring the Asian Dude in the Karate Gi
Quiz question: Who was the best character in the Final Fight Game?
Guy of course! The little Asian dude in the red karate gi with all of the explosive kicks was a definite fan favorite. This is why when they released the game on the SNES without Guy, fans went bananas!
If you really think about it, why is Gy even there? Haggar is there because his daughter has been kidnapped and probably sexually assaulted (I’m just saying). Cody is the boyfriend that wants his girlfriend back. Sure you could say it’s because he’s friends with Cody, but I suspect the ONLY reason is there is because he simply enjoys kickin’ a$s! Not a bad person to have on your team if you’re in a knock-down, drag-out, street fight to the death.
RULE #4: Spoiled Meat is Not Always Bad For You
If you’ve been scrappin’ with street punks all day long, you lose energy (or our good friend Abigail punches it all out of you). How to regain lost energy? By eating of course! With Mike Haggar being a politician and all you’re probably privy to some of the finest cuisine that Metro City has to offer, right? NOPE! Guess again…
Being dedicated to ridding this fair city of crime means getting your hands dirty, it means being an animal, it means eating out of trash cans if you have to. And usually that’s EXACTLY what you end up doing.
Final Fight teaches us that if you find food in a trash can, it’s perfectly okay to eat. You can find whole sides of rotted, barbecued meat, pork, spoiled sushi, and other delicious goodies if you really look hard enough. Whaddya mean you’re worried about spoilage? Are you a fighter? Or a faker? Well then, eat up!
RULE #5: If You’re a Politican You Can Kill Criminals With No Repercussions
I always wondered why Cody, Haggar and Guy never got locked up for murder. Sure Haggar was the mastermind behind it all, but all three of these guys are cold-blooded killers.
I guess in Metro City taking the law into your own hands doesn’t really count as a crime. I have a sinking feeling that not every “criminal” in this fight had something to do with the disappearance of Mike Haggar’s daughter. Ahh, the perks of being a state official.
RULE #6: You Only Need Three People to Fight the Crime of an Entire City
Hone your fighting skills to their max, and you will possess superhero-grade crime-fighting abilities… Do you realize that there are only three people in this crime-fighting team?!? Three folks! Cody, Guy, and Haggar, that’s it.
They took to the streets without so much as a can of mace and, using only the weapons around them and laid waste to HUNDREDS of criminals. Not one of ‘em even used a gun! How the heck do you pull that one off? Well, either these guys are incredibly gifted street fighters or Mad Gear is one of the suckiest street gangs on the planet.
RULE #7: Street Thugs Are More Resilient Than You Think
With the exception of P, Two P and some of the weaker thugs, you can pildrive ’em, punch ’em, tornado kick ’em in the face, beat ’em with rather long and heavy lead pipes, throw knives into their bodies, and they still come back for more! Let’s not even get started on bosses. With bosses it’s takes all you’ve got (and then some) to take them out.
RULE #8: Mixed Martial Arts is Effective
Of course Bruce Lee was one of the early adopters of the cross-training martial arts philosophy with Jeet Kune Do. But before the Gracies ever sparked the interest in the application of MMA in the ring, before the UFC ever became the juggernaut that it is today, Haggar, Cody and Guy were putting their cross-training to use on the streets: judo throws, wrestling maneuvers, backfists, jabs, uppercuts, spin kicks, jump kicks, headbutts and any other practical techniques to pummel street punks into the pavement.
RULE #9: If the Leader of the Gang is in a Wheel Chair, Kick His A$$ Anyway
All criminals must pay, despite their physical disposition. Final Fight teaches us that even if the bad guy comes at you in a wheel chair…what do you do? You throw him out of the nearest window!
Sure it sounds harsh, but if you show him mercy now, the gang will just reform. Plus you never know if a crime boss in a wheel chair is truly physically challenged. Turns out good friend, Belger, was faking all along. When he gets out of his wheel chair, he’s able to walk perfectly and shoots at you incessantly with a nail gun! (harpoon gun?).
RULE #10: Be Able to Dish it Out and Take It
You’ve got some of the deadliest hands on the planet and you run through nearly every criminal in Metro City, but if you have a glass jaw, and go down after one punch, the fight is over for you! When in a street fight it is critical to be able to get as good as you give.
RULE #11: When The Odds Are Stacked Against You, Pick Up a Weapon For God’s Sake!
The hell with all that fight fair stuff! If it’s seven against two, the bad guys already broke the rules. It’s only fair to pick up a knife and sling it as hard as you can into the group of evildoers. Is a knife too fatal for you? Fair enough. Pick up a pipe, a bottle, a can, a baseball bat, or whatever the heck gets you home safely!
These have been some of the many streetfighting gems that we gleaned from Final Fight (it isn’t advised that you actually do any of these things), but it makes for interesting conversation.
What other Streetfighting Tips Did You Learn From Arcade Classic, Final Fight?
Please share in the comments section below!
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